Blackout

My anthology documenting the politics
Similar, though we’re sinister
Titular in its overviewing
The shard in nature, London Bridge behavior — we savour
Every moment, momentary pleasures severe
The cord — bringing discord
Kick drum, maybe this chord
Let it ring, circulating I caught the sound wave
Bye to the vase — Holding my funeral flowers
Pain I devour, sour hours never ours
So sweet was the blood shed, for me
And everybody who believes in the unbelievable
Even though, it’s odd that we’re even and so retrievable
So we need it all
Not a thing can be omitted
From this being, perpendicular to my reasoning
One, also three of Him
So, I’m really needing Him
No, they won’t believe in Him
Go — my heart is seeking him
No — my mind is all over the place
Defeating the purpose of sound mind
Of course I have a sound mind
Where these lyrics come from
Darker than my heart, hole blacker
Struggle to hold it back — as I answer the charge — unplugging me from my power
source
Desperation kicking with boots that are steel capped
To the gut — knocking my spline — giving up with my soul colder
Than ice cubes in the South Pole
One October eve, with the waves hitting ‘em up, now minus 20 degrees
That cold, I couldn’t sleep
That cold, I couldn’t breathe
Back home, couldn’t contribute
At work, I couldn’t eat
Low p’s — did what I could
To struggle wasn’t the plan
Pretended it was all good
But didn’t feel like a man
I didn’t feel like a man
I didn’t feel like a man
I wanted to help my mum
But couldn’t hustle a grand!
The focus on building fans
Whilst looking round at my piers
I couldn’t step in their slippers
Or move around in their vans
I couldn’t walk in their shoes
The Deficit getting greater
The gap is widening fast
It’s getting later and later
Almost hitting thirty with your baby boy living
Six months — no quiet time
You struggle at thanksgiving
Slipping further and further away
No longer intimate, with the father who’s infinite
Definite in his etiquette
Better sit in his inner court
Better sip from his waterfall
Medicine to the sin
The prerequisite to this medical
I told Claire without a doubt
_ Zero Not Equal To One financing my house
Deposit laid, a percentage of what I’m aiming for for
That means I ate ambition, after swallowing my pride
To attain a bride, to confide in — I hide in
Mind all over the place
When all I really want is peace of mind — there go my thoughts again
Where? Lost again!
Erratic, erratic
And So let me talk to them, (how many?) — all of them
The weight is compressing, now heavy on my chest
Checkmate — exposing my heart — so take a vest
As I take that, then forget it — (Blackout)
My train of thought now derailed in my failings —
Break that — come and get it — (Blackout)
Commandeering, you took the wheel for a spin
Spin, spin
One eighty (Blackout), but I did a three sixty (Blackout)
I’m a broken man…
Jesus fix me — (Blackout)