Still Lost, Still Breathing

Another failed attempt to feel content
With the content of my existence, this is
Too much to take in
I’ve been here waitin' for an entrance
To stay in, I’m growing livid, impatient
Revert to sinnin', no savin' me
You’re a little too late, my common senses
Have drifted off, thought they all were in the hands of God
Guess I’m not chosen to be serving thee, I’m not enough
Cause if I was, I’m certain that I’d have it all
Livin' large, with no bad effects to anything I cause
Pause, too unrealistic and melodramatic
I’m clingin' to all my visions, it’s a hell of a habit
At least that means that there’s a chance that I could find solace
Before I end up getting all caught up in my nonsense
My mental’s spiralin', cryin' and dyin' while I’ve been
Hidin' it inside while the fires fry me and now I get
Why I might just die before I could become a man
Cause I can’t handle reality, and I understand
But I’m still lost…
Got hate and envy flowin' through my veins
Yeah
It slowed my drive until I hit the breaks
Woe is me
A broken heart and a wasted brain
Am I awake, or am I dreaming?
I’m still lost, still breathing
I’ve grown accustomed to these empty voids
Whether it’s lack of food or unfulfilled dreams
Completely numb, watch my ego destroy
Another piece of my anatomy 'til I’m obsolete
Then burn my ashes up, and throw me into dust
So I could feel the rush, adjust to that I must
It’s just my method of justice to deliver me from real
Everything that I hate, and everything that makes me feel
Like a dove who had learned to fly
Only to die when he reached the sky
Like I know nothing, even though I probably don’t
So that means that I’ll be declined
Right at Heaven’s gates, I’ll head away
To Acheron, I’m settling
Where I’m meant to be, realistically
So do not be fooled by my angel face
Cause I’m just a villain in disguise
Causing my own demise through everything that I despise
And right by my surprise, it hurts to realize
But at least, there’s a bright side cause I could still breathe
Yeah right…
Yeah…
Still lost, still lost
Still lost, still lost
I’m still lost, still lost
Still lost, still lost
Still lost, still lost
I’m still lost, still lost
Still lost, still lost
Still lost, still lost
But I’m still breathing