Pain (t me)

Paint me any color you want i can’t see anything
Shift the weight through the empty space —
The advantages they take
Lately i’ve been thinking about leaving my mind
It’s already separate from my body —
I don’t need either
I couldn’t commit to my beliefs and neither they to me
All evil people with no feeling
But jealousy…
Don’t give a shit:
Making out that we’re sick
Talk the talk but you know what you fucking did
Malicious intent — feeding a hurt mindset
Too drunk to contest…
You’re the one who’s fucking sick
But they drilled it into my brain that…
I hate me when i’m sober
I hate me when i’m not
So I pick the one that makes me forget it
I hate the way i feel
Throbbing in the side of my neck
I can feel the pulse; the complete regret I called you friends
FAKE
And isn’t it sick?
You pushed a situation
Shoved the alcohol down my throat —
Spun the word, closed the door
Fuck the way they want me to feel
I won’t anymore
Counting down the days until they re-learn my name —
They all talk about change and then remain the same
Counting down the days until they re-learn my name —
They all talk about change and then remain the same