Where Have All The Staplers Gone?

Larry: We don’t have much time before the big meeting.
Petunia: No. No, we don’t.
Larry: Have you seen the scissors, miss?
Petunia: They’re in the bottom drawer
Larry: I tried that drawer but they’re there no more
Petunia: That’s odd
Larry: I know I thought for sure
Petunia: Have you seen the masking tape?
Larry: It’s right next to the phone
Petunia: That’s what I thought but now’s it not
I guess I should have known
Together: Ohhhh… Where have all the staplers gone?
What happened to our paper clips?
Petunia: The ballpoint pens are gone again
Larry: They’re gone again
Together: The stick-it pads have lost their stick
Do you remember when…
Larry: The rubber bands were in their place?
Petunia: They’re in the middle drawer
Rubber Bands: Middle drawer, middle drawer
Larry: Light bulbs easy to replace
Petunia: Yes!
Larry: There were always more
Petunia: Reams of paper raining down
Paper: Raining, raining down
Together: Legal pads a plenty
Legal Pads: We’re legal
Petunia: Highlighters in every hue
Larry: I remember!
Together: Never less than twenty
Ohhhh… Where have all the staplers gone?
What happened to our paper clips?
Larry: The ballpoint pens are gone again
Petunia: They’re gone again
Together: We’ve run out of packing slips
Petunia: Someday my prints will come
Larry: Please replace the toner
Petunia: Someday we’ll find more of Larry: Our manila folders
Petunia: Someday my prints will come
Larry: Where’s the printer cable?
Petunia: Someday we’ll find more of Together: Adhesive shipping labels
Ohhhh… Where have all the staplers gone?
What happened to our paper clips?
Paper Clips/Staplers: Paper clips
Larry: The ballpoints are gone again
Petunia: They’re gone again
Together: The Sharpies all have flattened tips
Where have all the staplers gone?
Narrator: This has been Obscure Broadway Show Tunes with Larry. Tune in for act
two: Revenge of the Staplers.