Gordon's Revenge

Ah so
The ducks are sitting and I making my list now
Macc Lads stagger in and their all f**king pissed
The f**king drunk bastards can’t take their beer
Free gravy tonight, I’ve got bad diarrhoea
Sea food special with extra crab
Two pancake with a penis scab
See you tomorrow and we have chick pie
We have dog and I think he about to die…
Cut your nail into prawn cracker
Add black bit from around my knaccars
Call me Chinky, little yellow git
You’ll be on the bog for a week
'Cos you want to know what’s in my wok
Pubic lice from around my cock
Egg foo young and crispy noodle
No I haven’t seen your poodle…
You want to try my sweet and sour chicken
I give you free bag to be sick in
Call me slanty, you’re very very nasty
I fart on chips and piss on pastie
Chinky cunt? Ha, very very funny
Jumbo sausage, chips and curry
Gordon smile and take the money
Excellant laddy, my arse is runny
Pie Taster
Oi, oi, oi
She had just turned twenty nine
Needed a good ironing
Smelling like a dench
Face looked like a welder’s bench
And she was baggy at the rear
She could fart for Lancashire
And she said she liked the taste of me bellend chedder
And she asked me if I wanted fer bed her
She were desperate for a f**k
Said her cunt were ill enough
She had piles and NSU
Creepy crawlies in her pubes
And dribbling out of her womb
Were semen and the QE2
But I’ve never been to bed with an ugly woman
But I’ve woken up with one or two
No he’s never been to bed with an ugly woman
But he’s woken up with quite a few
Stretch marks on her bum
Tated pies for Titterton’s
Stretch marks on her bum
Tasted pies for Titterton’s
Stretch marks on her bum
Tasted pies for Titterton’s
Stretch marks on her bum
Tasted pies for Titterton’s
Stretch marks on her bum…
Yaaaw
Yaaaw
But I’ve never been to bed with an ugly woman
But I’ve woken up with one or two
No he’s never been to bed with an ugly woman
But he’s woken up with quite a few