Dead Cat

A ya ya ya ya ya yaaar…
No petrol in the van
Knee deep in empty cans
We’ve lost the map, the tyre’s flat, the bloody kid’s been banned
We stopped off for some grease, Nevis is obese
We left him standing empty handed
Ten miles outside Leeds
Oh no…
Just find us a pub where the ale and tarts are free
Lock that f**king door
We’ll drink beer to eternity
Someone farted in the back
Fast Fret found a cat
It was in the road, all stiff and cold and squashed and thin and flat
He wants to bring it back in a Tesco bag
It’s got one eye, it’s full of flies
He’s got to have something to shag
For f**k's sake…
Just find us a pub where the ale and tarts are free
Lock that f**king door
We’ll drink beer to eternity
(Repeat to end)