Incredibad

Nowwwwwww let’s take a trip down memory lane
Back to junior high school where it all begain
Three bad little kids raisin hell at school
We were just 13, straight actin the fool
Every day after class Kiva’s house was the spot
Makin crazy prank calls hopin not to get caught
Best friends, blood brothers, yo we one and the same
'Til one fateful afternoon when everything changed
One day playin Punch Out up in Kiv’s room
The house started shakin and we heard a kaboom
Looked out the back window saw billowin smoke
Yo your backyard is smashed — man this isn’t a joke!
(Yo let’s go check this out man) (Aight bet, let’s go)
All the smoke and debris led straight to the basement
Yo what the hell is that? Man it looks like a spaceship
We all ran for cover, as the hatch opened wide
And a little green dude stepped out from inside; he said
I’m from Mars, and I come in peace
I have something to ask, and it’s not discrete
There’s a mutated strain in our DNA helix
And you three kids are the ones who can heal it
But we’re just thirteen man, what can we do?
Umm how should I put this? I think we should screw
(What?!) On my home planet we can no longer breed
I’ve been sent as a receptacle to store your seed
Storin' our seed? — Yo I think he means sex
Man, I’m a virgin — we all are — BET!
I’m just gonna lie here and close my eyes
Aww, what should we do? Now he’s spreading his thighs!
You’ll be heroes on our planet But why us three?
You’re the chosen ones, you’ll just have to trust me
Yo, should we do it? Man I don’t know
I say we put it to a vote (oh yeah) (yeah)
All in favor
Say aye… AYE~!
Okay, we’re in
Cool
Who should go first?
I have three depositories to capture your burst
Wait, so at the same time? Yeah that’s what I was thinking
Here’s some wine coolers, let’s get you boys drinking
We pounded the drinks and, started gettin tipsy
Then took our positions, and started gettin frisky
One in the front, and two in the back
Had it locked up like a Chinese finger trap
Keep pumping away, my wife and family thank you
I’m about to explode — yo son, me too
THREE-WAY CLIMAX, best friends forever
What a blessing to have lost our virginity together
Yeah!
Andy, Jorma, Kiv', you’ve saved my race
Your reward is one wish then I’ll go back to space
We looked at each other, didn’t have to talk
Knew exactly what we wanted, before he took off
Mr. Alien Sir, for what it’s worth
WE WANT TO BE THE GREATEST FAKE MC’S ON EARTH
Your wish is granted and thanks again
I may have saved my planet but I’m losing three friends
What happened today was both incredible and bad
Therefore your name is Incredibad!
Incredibad…
STOP STOP STOP STOP, STOP!
SA-PRIZE, EVERYONE! (sirens)