What Did You Do on Election Day?

What did you do on election day,
Oh, dear brother of mine?
What did you do on election day,
My darlin' brother?
I kicked the pamphlets off the porch an'
Read the latest Forbes and Fortune,
Went to work on my tan,
Felt distinctly disenfranchised,
Threw my Bee Gees records away.
That’s what I did on election day.
That’s what I did last Tuesday.
What did you do on election day,
Oh, dear sister of mine?
What did you do on election day,
My darlin' sister?
I met the girls at the courts,
Wrote a note to Arnold Schwarzenegger,
Caught up on my soaps,
Pinched my cheeks and dashed my hopes,
Threw my sample ballot away.
That’s what I did on election day.
That’s what I did last Tuesday.
What did you do on election day,
Oh, dear father of mine?
What did you do on election day,
My darlin' daddy?
I cashed my check and cleaned my gun,
Read Cal Thomas and the funnies,
Made a payment on my plot,
Thought a thought I’ve since forgotten,
Threw my recycling buckets away.
That’s what I did on election day
That’s what I did last Tuesday.
What did you do on election day,
Oh, dear cousin of mine?
What did you do on election day,
My distant cousin?
I voted! — «What?!»
I voted Yes on A-B-C
No on W-X-Y-Z
Tore my stub, drove home and then,
Back to the polls and voted again…
And again, and again…
Once for everyone who stayed away,
That’s what I did last Tuesday.
Otherwise a real slow news day.