I Had a Job

once upon a time i had a job
cleaning an office landscape
the lunch and smooking room, the toilets
worked evenings all alone
it was perfect
listened to music, full volume
smoked where I pleased
admired the view
used their telephones, cried
I was so in love with you then
one evening a saw
my friends walk into town
I felt like a spy
no, a guardian
at peace with everyone
a bond
because they seemed to have so much fun
it made me so happy
I got sad
or the other way around
I forget
one day I’ll be dead
I’ll die
my horror, small comfort
the only sure thing
the only sure thing