Happy Birthday

Happy birthday, happy birthday
How old are you, how old are you?
I’m 32 and I have to lose 20 pounds to be attractive, to be the kind of person
I want. This is the year I’m gonna do it.
Have you ever promised yourself that before?
How did you know? I’ve been on and off diets since I was 18.
So, you’ve been making and breaking the same resolution for more than a decade?
Well, if you want to put it that way.
Let’s face facts. Your approach doesn’t seem to be working.
No matter how hard you struggle and strive
You never get outta those shoes alive
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
All you gonna get is a ticket to ride
Happy birthday, happy birthday
How old are you, how old are you?
I’m 47 years old and still don’t know how to assert myself and get what I want.
I just never learned to be aggressive.
You can get ahead by cooperating as well as competing.
The hell you can. It’s a jungle out there. Kill or be killed.
Lack of assertiveness can be a problem. It does not seem to be yours.
Look, Mr Good Vibes. I know what my problem is. I’ve had it my whole life.
I understand perfectly.
No matter how hard you struggle and strive
You never get outta those shoes alive
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
All you gonna get is a ticket to ride
Happy birthday, happy birthday
How old are you, how old are you?
I’m 23 years old and all my friends tell me I’m talented. I wanna be a really
big television or recording star.
Do you go out on auditions?
How can I? Who’s gonna look after my kid?
Can you hire a mother’s helper?
Can’t afford it.
How about a relative or a neighbor?
Oh, I just wouldn’t feel right asking.
Perhaps you expect a producer to drive up in a limousine and discover you at the local drugstore?
Well, it has happened before.
Frankly, my dear, this is nothing but fantasy.
No matter how hard you struggle and strive
You never get outta those shoes alive
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
All you gonna get is a ticket to ride
Happy birthday, happy birthday
How old are you, how old are you?
Your birthday is a good time to take a look at yourself. Be ruthlessly honest.
Are you a person who gets things done, or a procrastinator? Can you control
your habits? Do you see yourself onjectively or do you require a myth?
If you think you’re fooling anyone, you’re only fooling yourself.
Now, sir, how old did you say you are today?
I just turned 40 and for the last few month I’ve been feeling like it’s all
over, as though life had already passed me by. It feels like I’m dying.
That’s right. You are dying.
What do you mean by that?
The fact is, even as we talk your allotted time is slipping away.
More of your life is behind you. And that means that less is in front of you.
That’s a pretty depressing way to wish a guy happy birthday.
Look at it this way, friend. You may be dying, but you still have some time
left, so let’s sit down and take stock of where you’ve been and where you’re
heading. Life will always appear too short. Only you can make it worthwhile.
No matter how hard you struggle and strive
You never get outta those shoes alive
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
All you gonna get is a ticket to ride
Happy birthday, happy birthday
How old are you, how old are you?
Where there’s a will, there’s a way