I Don't Understand

When I’m asleep
I leave the light on
And try to breathe
Relive the moment I was born
I feel the breeze
It feels electric
Then mockery
Another headache I reject
Suppose the feeling’s real
You’d never know
Suppose it’s what you feel
You’ll never know
That’s what I don’t understand
That’s what I don’t know
Now I’m awake
I leave the light on
And take a swim
Beneath the rocks and undertow
I try to scream
I don’t remember where I’ve been
A trampoline
Another lack of oxygen
Suppose the feeling’s real
You’d never know
Suppose it’s what you feel
You’ll never know
I open my mouth but there’s
Nothing to swallow down
I’m scratching my face like there’s
Something, farther down
It’s like a drug
I turn the light off
And pull the plug
But still it always comes back on
Suppose you change your mind
And back again
Suppose you had more time
And adrenaline