Mr. Ice Cream Man (Skit)

Mr Ice Cream Man:
Ice cream goddamn it, let’s go
It’s ice cream, I got ice cream right here
What you need yo, I see y’all over there
Come here, I got ice cream goddamn it
How many of y’all want ice cream
Where y’all at, ice cream right here right here
Now what y’all little motherfuckers want
Come on and tell me yo
Kid 1:
Mr ice cream man, why you curse so much
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Don’t yo mamma curse
I’m on parole like your daddy, motherfucker
Now what your little badass want yo
Kid 2:
I want vanilla cone
With sprinkles… and I want icy
Mr Ice Cream Man:
You son of bitches
No you can’t have shit, you bastard
Give me your goddamn dollar motherfucker
Mother:
Hold up, you black motherfucker
You need to watch the way you talk around these kids
Especially my son, you ice cream drunk driver
You need to have a little more respect for these kids
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Hold up bitch, Hold up bitch
Bitch, I ain’t give your goddamn son fully yet
That’s half your goddamn son
Mother:
Look, I’m not trying to hear this shit
You fucking broke ass motherfucker
Driving a ice cream truck
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Go to the library, and be quiet there
Mother:
I got a motherfucking trick for you
I’m calling the police on your ass
Mr Ice Cream Man:
The Police?
Mother:
I’m telling them that your selling drugs
On the ice cream truck
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Your mamma going to get locked up
She buy drugs from the ice cream truck
Mother:
See, if I come in the house and get my husband
He’ll come out and whoop your motherfucking ass
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Can nobody in your family whoop me
Can’t not goddamn one person in your family whoop me
Mother:
My husband used to box golden gloves
And he’ll come out here and knock you out on the fucking first round
Mr Ice Cream Man:
If he could put the pipe down
He might could, motherfucker
If he put that smoke down one minute
He might can whoop my ass
But he’ll never get to try
Cause he ain’t going to put the crack crack down
Mother:
You know what fuck you motherfucker
Fuck you you fucking asshole
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Fuck you and your mamma motherfucker
Kid 2:
Mr ice cream man, you mean
Mr Ice Cream Man:
I just like your grandmama
I just like her
So get your dirty ass out of here
Give me a dollar or get the fuck out of here
Kids:
Arguing were heard
Mr Ice cream man:
Hold up mother fucker
Hold up motherfucker
Hold up you little dirty motherfuckers
This is a motherfucking stick-up
Kids:
Oh no!
Mr Ice Cream Man:
Give me your motherfucking
Nickels, quarters, skateboards
Baseball cards, all that bullshit
You got a gummy bear
Come here you little dirty bastard
Give me your goddamn lunch money
Your fucking lunch money
Your combination to your locker
Your PSPs, all that bullshit
You got some new Jordan’s on
Come here with them Jordan’s
Sit your motherfucking ass down, nigga
I want all that shit
And your mamma phone number
Kid 2:
I’m telling my daddy
Imma get my daddy
Mr Ice Cream Man:
And I love to stay here
And kick it with y’all little dirty motherfuckers
But I’m late for parole so get the fuck back
I’m out of here you little dirty motherfuckers
Announcer:
Red’s gone wild