My Name Is Mud

My name is Mud
My name is Mud
Not to be confused with Billy, Jack, Pete or Dennis
My name is mud, it’s always been
'Cause I’m the most boring sonsabitch you’ve ever seen
I dress in blue, yes, navy blue
From head to toe I’m rather drab except my patent shoes
I make 'em shine, well most the time
'Cept today my feet were trodden on by this friend of mine
Six foot two and rude as hell
I got to get him in the ground before he starts to smell
My name is Mud
My name is Mud
But call me Aloysius Devadander Abercrombie
That’s long for Mud, so I’ve been told
Told that by this sonsabitch that lies before me
Bloated, blue and cold
I’ve got my pride, I drink my wine
I’d drink only the finest
'Cept I haven’t earned a dime in several months
Or were it years?
The breath on that fat bastard could bring any man to tears
We had our words, a common spat
So I kissed him upside the cranium with an aluminum baseball bat
My name is Mud
My name is Mud
M-M-M-M-M-Mud
My name is Mud
Where you goin', city boy?