I Used to Hate Myself

I’ve got something that’ll make you mad
I’m over all the times we had
I’m over you always complaining about your dad and I’m fine
I’ve got something that’ll piss you off
I stopped avoiding your house on walks
I don’t look for your face in every coffee shop and I’m fine
If you asked me if I missed you I’d say never in a million years
I’m probably wrong, I miss you still
If you asked me if I’m doing well I’d let you know that it’s more than I could
hope
I’m at war with myself
I used to hate myself
I guess I kind of still do
And I spent half the time just blaming all my problems on you
So I got comfortable
It’s all I could do
And I got closer than ever to working out the way I should get to you
If you asked me if I missed you I’d say never in a million years
I’m probably wrong, I miss you still
If you asked me if I’m doing well I’d let you know that it’s more than I could
hope
I’m at war with myself
I used to hate myself
I guess I kind of still do
And I regret all of the time I spent wasting all the love I had on you
I want it back now
It’s the right thing to do
But if I see you in the future I won’t ask for it or even leave a clue