You Can't Do Me

You can’t do me, you can’t do me
You can’t do me the way you did before
You can’t do me, you can’t do me
You can’t do me the way you did before
'Cause when you do and when you do
'Cause when you do, you know I get so blue
When you do and when you do
And when you do, you know I get so blue
And I go down like a deep sea diver
Out like a Coltrane tenor man
Lost like a Chinese war baby
Gone, gone, gone
I’d be blue like a Mississippi sharecropper
Screwed like a high school cheerleader
Tattooed like a popeyed sailor man
Gone, gone, gone
I should have been, I should have been
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
I should have been, I should have been
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
And for a while, just a while, for a good long while
You’d see me smile, smile, smile
I’d crawl the seas on my bony knees
No apologies for my brave new style
I wouldn’t go bust like an Internet millionaire
Boom like a Lebanese belly dancer
Bang like a new year’s firecracker
Gone, gone, gone
I wouldn’t get bent like a rattan rockin' chair
Blanked like a last place also ran
Burned like an Arkansas griddlecake
Gone, gone, gone
Gone, gone, gone
Gone, gone, gone
I should have been, I should have been
I should have been a pair of ragged claws
And if I was, if I was
Then if I was then I’d complain no more
And for a while, for just a while, for a good long while
You’d see me smile, smile, smile
I’d crawl the seas on my bony knees
No apologies for my brave new style
I wouldn’t get wrecked like a rebel on a racetrack
Jacked like a '51 Cadillac
Macked like a bunny in a mansion
Gone, gone, gone
Spittooned like an Alabama 'backy wad
Harpooned in a Melville sailor yard
Cartooned like a Charlie Brown Christmas card
Gone, gone, gone
Schooled like a milk money bully whip
Sued like a teenage downloader
Unglued like a bull in a china shop
Gone, gone, gone
Cranked like a speed freak high roller
Yanked like a little league ball swatter
Spanked like a fly on a bar counter
Gone, gone, gone
Duked like a pistol whipped card swapper
Rebuked like a Bible belt border crosser
Juked like a payola chart topper
Gone, gone, gone