Make It Up As I Go

I keep on running backwards
I keep on losing faith
I thought I had the answers
I thought I knew the way
My brother said be patient
My mother held my hand
I don't know what I'm chasing
I don't know who I am
Woke up this morning holding my head
Thinking last night is one I'll regret
Washing off the bad decisions, the blurry vision
The clues that I'm still a mess
Spitting out the taste I have in my mouth
Knowing what this all is really about
Knowing there's an explanation, an expiration
I gotta figure shit out
And they're asking me if I can see
The darkness down below
And I know it's true, I say I do
When half the time I don't
Maybe I can't make what it may take
To leave this thing behind
But I shut my eyes and cross each line
And every time
I keep on running backwards
I keep on losing faith
I thought I had the answers
I thought I knew the way
My brother said be patient
My mother held my hand
I don't know what I'm chasing
I don't know who I am
Waking in the dead of night, I can't sleep
Sleeping in the light of day for like weeks
Reality was out of focus, I could be hopeless
Instead I gritted my teeth
I didn't have the patience left to explain
Didn't wanna wait while nobody came
I know the path ahead's uneven, but while I'm breathing
I have to make my own lane
And they're asking me if I can see
The darkness down below
And I know it's true, I say I do
When half the time I don't
Maybe I can't make what it may take
To leave this thing behind
But I shut my eyes and cross each line
And every time
I keep on running backwards
I keep on losing faith
I thought I had the answers
I thought I knew the way
My brother said be patient
My mother held my hand
I don't know what I'm chasing
I don't know who I am
So, I make it up as I go
I make it up as I go
So, I make it up as I go
I make it up as I go, as I go
I keep on running backwards
I keep on losing faith
I thought I had the answers
I thought I knew the way
My brother said be patient
My mother held my hand
I don't know what I'm chasing
I don't know who I am
So, I make it up as I go
I make it up as I go
So, I make it up as I go
I make it up as I go, as I go