Lovely Fiction

My aunties dream of swimming when a child is conceived
I used to pray they wouldn’t dream of fishes for me
Merging genes with someone kindred, what a vision
Could I carry a child? Would my body go the distance?
I wanna love the way mama and Ruby loved me
Help them form their first sentences, survive the police
Let’s turn a phrase--I don’t wanna fight for execution stays, abbreviated living
Don’t know if I could teach them forgiveness
‘Cause I ain’t mastered it
Still giving up the master’s tools
Still mending shit with masking tape
Still working for the master’s school
I pray I help you master you
Hope you ask me 'bout the world
And hope that I would tell the truth
In my family offspring don’t spring often
I approach the prospect of you with due caution
My little fiction, you can rest up in my head for now
Running through my dreams, I’m scared as hell to let you down
What a lovely fiction you are
What a blessed figment of my imagining
You’re too good to be true
But, baby, I could be so damn good to you
I’m tryna be the one you manifested even when your faith had vanished
The shorty that would short her last to give you an advantage
And you’d do the same, passion never abandoned
We’d manage to make a mountain out the molehill we were granted
Black queer radical, nothing short of magical, joy like sabbatical
Boy, you make the rational factual seem frivolous, girl, you on some different
shit
And gotdamnit I’m into it
To keep it funky, I know I could make you love me
But trust me, I’ve got some work to do to make me worth the cuffing
Spirit told me fall back, it’ll fall in place
And I’m turning 25, is that too old for the chase?
If we cutting to it, I’ll be in the cutting room
Tucking keys with love to make a masterpiece or two
I can’t imagine what you feel like yet
Like fiction turned fact at the moment we met
Let’s go
What a lovely fiction you are
What a blessed figment of my imagining
You’re too good to be true
But, baby, I could be so damn good to you
All in my head
All in my heart
All in my soul
All about you
All about you
All about you
All about you real soon
All about me right now
I’m tryna fix these faults
I’m tryna heal these wounds
I’m tryna live this truth
All in my head
All in my heart
All in my soul
All in on you
All in on you
All in on you
All about you real soon
All about me right now
I’m tryna fix these faults
I’m tryna heal these wounds
I’m tryna live this truth
All in my head
All in my heart
All in my soul
All in on you
All in on you
All in on you
All about you real soon
All about me right now
I’m tryna fix these faults
I’m tryna heal these wounds
I’m tryna live this truth
I’m tryna live this truth
I’m tryna live this truth
I’m tryna live this truth
I’m tryna live this truth
Huhhh, why you calling me?
(Open the door)