Church

I won’t even try to stand.
So I can feel nothing.
My intentions were always so good.
Now and then you said to me.
«You always look ahead.»
I believed in me and so in our love.
Turn the page — My diary.
Nothing from my memories.
I cannot open my eyes.
Like drawning in the sea.
It’s not sad.
It’s not funny.
Not angry and not lonely.
I can do nothing.
I’m at a loss what to do.
If God is in the church.
Why won’t he make me strong.
I — I know nothing is not speaking.
I lift up my face.
And open my eyes.
And I will try to stand.