Makeshift Idol

Is it hard to realize
That I don’t want this hazy night to be immortalized
I see your camera’s pointed at me but I don’t like to be seen through
artificial eyes
This might be me at large, I’m not in charge
But I don’t think that’s something for you to decide
I’ll have my memory and if I don’t that’s not something I would like to see
revised
Well she said: «Carve your makeshift idol out of misery»
Yet my mother’s thrown off balance by its gravity
Now it sits looming in the corner and it’s waiting for the
Downfall of myself and those who try to follow me
Deserting dressing room is invoking impending doom
And I don’t seem able to fight off the glorious cloak of gloom
Insecurity the cure, keep the ratrace running
No one here is pure, it’s the light we’re shunning
Your self-centered solar system screams youth is unforgiving
Reality is rich and life is for the living
I see the blue running
We’ll see the pictures running
I’ve been praying
I see the picture running
We’ll see the scrolling
Now pull out your guts and cut out your eyes
For my holding on too long I will pay the price
Just present me the bill
I’ll swallow the bitter pill
I feel winter’s chill
I feel winter’s chill
Don’t ask you to sing about me
Just want you to think about me
But oh forget my faith
Don’t go telling me it’s too late
Cause I’ve been picking up pieces
My self deception decreases
All the boasting it ceases
As I’ve been noticing creases
I got served my slice of humble pie
And cleared the plate with taste
It unnerved me to face my own lie
So I cleared the plate with haste
See you burst the bubble of the motion picture of my ego
Mess around with my head, follow us to places we go
Want to spend this night being carefree
So I just hope that you don’t see
This liquid that drips out of me
Not blue, not red but burgundy