Ghost in the Routine

Yeah, I know I’m supposed
To think about the bright side, 'cause it helps
But I stow everything in a hold and locked up in a cell
Like an actor that is playing a role
Convincing everyone this is who I am
For months I’ve just been faking it all
Convincing them all, making sure none can tell
It’s so, so damn bad
(I fake smile as they walk past)
And I know not everyone gets that
(All my thoughts are a steel trap)
Honestly? I hide myself away
Then put on a face, pretend that I’m okay
Do you know? Can you see the glimpses of my hell?
How I owe, owe it to myself to seek out help?
Like a chameleon with its camouflage on
I’m convincing them all, blend into the place I dwell
Not letting anyone see me fall, concealing it all
Masquerading behind a veil
It’s so damn bad
And I know, yeah I know
I really should fight back
It’s so, so damn bad
(I fake smile as they walk past)
And I know I really should fight back
(All my thoughts are a steel trap)
Honestly? I hide myself away
Then put on a face, to keep questions at bay
I honestly try to be honest when I say that I’m okay
Put on a good face for each day just to keep questions at bay