Strictly Genteel

Lord, have mercy on the people in England
For the terrible food these people must eat
(Errrr. .. excuse me)
And may the Lord have mercy on the fate of this movie
And God bless the mind of the man in the street
Help all the rednecks and the flatfoot policemen
Through the terrible functions they all must perform
God help the winos, the junkies, and the weirdos
And every poor soul who’s adrift in the storm.
Help everybody, so they all get some action
Some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction
A room and a meal
And a garbage disposal
A lawn and a hose’ll
Be strictly genteel
Reach out your hand to the girl in the dog book
The girl in the pig book, and the one with the horse
Make sure they keep all those businessmen happy
And the purple-lipped censors and the Germans of course
Help everybody, so they all get some action
Some love on the weekend, some real satisfaction
A Swedish apparatus
With a hood and a bludgeon
With a microwave oven
«Honey, how do it feel?»
Lord, have mercy on the hippies and faggots
And the dykes and the weird little children they grow
Help the black man
Help the poor man
Help the milk man
Help the door man
Help the lonely, neglected old farts that I know
It’s been swell havin' you with us tonight, folks!
But, don’t leave the theater yet, 'cause there’s still more to come,
but before we go on, I want to introduce to you my friend and musical
associate, Howard Kaylan, who’s going to give us all a final closing
benediction