Maria

She climbs a tree
And scrapes her knee
Her dress has got a tear
She waltzs on her way to mass
And whistles on the stair
And underneath her wimple
She has curlers in her hair!
I’ve even heard her singing in the abbey
She’s always late for chappe,
But her penitence is real
She’s always late for everything
Except for every meal
I hate to have to say it but I very firmly feel
(all together)
Maria’s not an asset to the abbey
(one nun)
I’d like to say a word in her behalf:
Maria makes me laugh
(all nuns laugh)
(all nuns)
How do you solve a problem like maria?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Maria?
(one nun at a time)
A flibbertajibbit?
A will of a whisp
a clown
Many a thing you know you’d like tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay?
And listen to all you say
how do you keep a wave upon the sand?
Oh how do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you hold a moon beam in your hand?
When I’m with her
I’m confused
Out of focus
And bemused
And I never know exactly where I am
(one nun at a time)
Unpredictable as weather
She’s as flighty as a feather
She’s a darling
She’s a demon
She’s a lamb
She’d out pester any pest
Drive a hornet from its nest
She can throw a twirling dervish out of whirl
She is gentle
She is wild
She’s a riddle
She’s a child
She’s a headache
She’s an angel
She’s a girl!
(all at once)
How do you solve a problem like Maria?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Maria?
A flibbertajjibet
A will of a wisp
A clown
Many a thing you know you’d like to tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay?
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?
Oh how do you solve a problem like maria?
How do you hold a moon beam in your hand?