Memories

It’s like I’m running outta time counting every second
Life flashing back from beginning till the present
Another lesson to be taught or a chance of redemption?
Or a final shot to reach my inner heaven?
Hell, I don’t even know anymore
Cus I can’t tell the difference anymore
Is it love or hate? Or just one single force
Cus every question that I ask only gets ignored
But I assure, you, that every memory
Equival shining light, and what it meant to me!
Got me through the worst of all negative energy
And that’s the reason why the gratitude right next to me
But mentally, lately, I’ve been falling in the hellish deep
Hellish people try abuse my goodwill to break the seal
Tryna free themselves to leave me stuck in gravity
I keep calling ya name, liberate me from reality
I’m lost, I can’t find my way out of here
I’ll admit it, I need your guidance over here
Was dropped into the war zone right over here
And I don’t really wanna have to go and disappear
If it means another sacrifice, I’m already in Hell
It’s why I feel like telling God to go fuck himself
For everything I lost, I’m still hearing church bells
I exhale the smoke and wonder, what’s left here
I see a dark primitive future upon us
I see my heart stopping because I’m exhausted
I see myself locked in a room with nothing but bricks
I see the place where I’m from is turning to nothing but shit
I can’t forget, but lately, my mind been fighting me
Against my most cherished memories crying to me
Reminding me, of my biggest regret, the crime…
Was leaving the car after kissing you goodbye
Ready or not, I’ll leave the choice up to you
My emotion in this letter, that I wrote to you
And I always tried to be honest with you
That’s why I wrote this song for you
And that’s just how it is…
Shit…
I just don’t know anymore…