The New James Bond

We met in the casino
That’s when I overheard
Him ordered a martini
He wanted shaken and not stirred
I nestled up behind him
His name I wish to know
He said his name was «Bond, James Bond»
That’s when I said, «Oh»
We shared a game of blackjack
And James had twenty-one
But the house had only twenty
I guess that means he won
He’s the New James Bond
And I’m his bottle blond
I’m one of seven in his harem
And he really turns me on
He has a license to kill
And permission to love
Oh, my new James Bond
You’re who I’m thinking of
My old boyfriend drove a Nissan
He bought used in '83
But James has got a Beemer
And it can go under the sea
When he takes me to the drive-thru
And says that I should treat
And then he takes my french fries
And ejects me from my seat
He said he’s going on a mission
And that he can’t be late
And he doesn’t need the cargo
And I’m only extra weight
For him, I would be kidnapped
Just to earn my love’s respect
For him, I’d take a bullet
And my James would not object
My old boyfriend had mounted
An enormous poker debt
But not my O-O-7
For he’s never lost a bet
When we’re at the roulette table
He says to go powder my face
And when I come back from the bathroom
There’s a new girl in my place
He says it’s strictly business
And they’ve own had sex twice
Then he tells me I should get lost
But he says it very nice