On Paper

I’m not so easy on the eye
It’s been said my face can make an onion cry
I mean no harm, but I’ve got the charm
Of a murdering serial raper
I never get none, and I know why
But there’s more to me than meets the eye
The real live me ain’t certified
But I look good on paper
Statistically I’m far above the rest
I do my homework, never have to guess
My social life’s an empty wreck
Romance is an alien labor
There are things about me you’ll never know
Unless you scratch the surface and look below
My resume is solid gold
I look good on paper
I got straight A’s on every test
A perfect credit score
My ledgers never in the red
I look good on paper
I never get none, and I know why
But there’s more to me than meets the eye
If you got the time I’m qualified
I look good on paper
I look good on paper
I look good
On paper
On paper