Lipstick on the Mirror

There was a problem in the girl’s room at the elementary school
Just above the seven sinks along the wall
That’s the spot that held the mirror with a permanent reflection
Of a half a dozen toilets in six stalls
First day of the autumn term last period was over
All the little girls went on their way
The janitor was making rounds, like he always did
But there was a brand new mess to clean up on that day
There was lipstick on the mirror
There was lipstick on the mirror
There was lipstick on the mirror
There were 27 sets of scarlet smooches
The janitor, his name was Bob, spent 30 extra minutes
'Cause he couldn’t leave his job in such a mess
But there they were the next day, all those crimson colored kisses
And for Bob another half hour after class
There was lipstick on the mirror
There was lipstick on the mirror
There was lipstick on the mirror
There were 27 sets of scarlet smooches
A week went by and every day the same routine would happen
Bob cleaned 'em off at nighttime, they were back again by lunch
'Til he finally left the principal a note about the lip-prints
That Bob no longer wanted to expunge (who could blame him?)
But bureaucracy was moving slow, that’s kinda what they do
And the situation dragged along and festered
What with memos to the teachers and occasional announcements
Still conditions hadn’t changed that whole semester
There was lipstick on the mirror
There was lipstick on the mirror
There was lipstick on the mirror
There were 27 sets of scarlet smooches
So the principal got desperate, she ordered an assembly
She’d devised a way to help the students see
The burden of this extra work would come in clearer focus
Friday in the girl’s bathroom at 3
Young ladies, you know Bob, he’s the one who we can thank
For keeping all our windows clean and clearer
I just wanted you to see firsthand all the extra work he does
Every time you put your lips there on the mirror
Then Bob pulled out a squeegee with a handle six feet long
And he held it high for all the girls to see
Then he dipped it in a toilet and he splashed it on those lip-prints
You could hear a seat drop in that lavatory
No more lipstick on the mirror
No more lipstick on the mirror
No more lipstick on the mirror
Not one solitary set of scarlet smooches
No more lipstick on the mirror
No more lipstick on the mirror
No more lipstick on the mirror
And a model of accelerated learning