Ukip Hop

There now follows a party political gangster rap
On behalf of the UK Independence Party
Hello
I’m Nigel Farage
Also known as Nigel Farage
Nigel Farage
So step back, Nicki Minaj
Cause I’m a wicked politician at large
With a vision of Britain
With no immigrant barges
Barging in
Causing arguments and argy-bargy
The Falklands is ours
We barred it from the Argies
Don’t mess with the UK Independence Party
Cause we’ve a tendency to get nasty
Each time I gave a splendid speech
We gained momentum, speed
Faraging with a vengeance
We are in the ascendancy
A swing of the pendulum
And we will gain a bench of seats
Unrepentantly pro-Independence
See, my ideal ending scene
Is a never-ending referendum
On foreign bureaucrats
And where the heck we’re going to send them
Next on the agenda?
Bloody hell, I can’t remember
I’m too busy thinking
Of becoming an honourable member
I’m that friendly MEP
Aiming for an MBE
The Lib Dems and the BNP
They envy me
They know what I’m going to be
So they’re poking fun at me
I’ve no fear
Bring your smears
Sling your mud at me
But bugger bringing in a single currency
What’s the problem
With the monetary system we’ve got currently?
Great Britain is an excellent island
Significantly better than Ireland
I learned not
To be outnumbered by a bunch of Scots
Cause they’ve a tendency
To pile in and get violent
But I’m a man of great class
Make you look a straight ass
I carry on my campaign
Straight after a plane crash
Tell these champagne Socialists
I’m here to gatecrash
I’ll Moët to your Babycham
And I can’t wait to break glass
Rah
I dedicate this ungodly tune
To an MEP gone too soon
In memory of Godfrey Bloom
Rest in peace, Godfrey
What?
I know he’s not actually dead
But it’s better than saying he was forced to leave
For calling a group of women at the conference a bunch of sluts
Anyway, I digress
The point of the message that I’m trying to convey today
Is that voting for UKIP would be a splendid idea
The fighting bull strikes again
God save the Queen
Penelope Keith
Dennis the Menace
Roger the Dodger
Tintin
What?
Tintin’s Belgian?
Why wasn’t I informed of this?
Why did nobody tell that Tintin is Belgian?!
Get his literature out of my office now!