Portraits of Eyes

each one filled me with closed eyes and falling
like a key for the lock to my mouth
every night seemed like an end to the dreaming
and the wait…
even time screamed like the nausea ending
but sometimes the sickness came back
this every day was like a new kind of crawling along
i went in search of peace of mind
and my family’s eyes
imagine all the space i’d find…
please don’t cry if i ask
the way to the rope my love
i’m not gonna tie any knots
i just need you to hold on while i go down
i’ve started to wander outside of the walls
and map out the darkness around
the first page of my map is in colour
a scrapbook for all that i love
the second page of my map is all selfish desires
and looks like the work of a child
nobody needs to know the rest of my country
i see all i need and it’s mine
nobody needs to know that i can’t breathe or love