The Intoxicated Rat

The other night when I came home
So drunk I could not see
I got tangled up in the old doormat
Fell flat as I could be
And I had me a little old bottle of rum
And I did have any more and
The cap fell of when I fell down
And I spilled it on the floor
Then a rat come out from his hiding place
And he got that whiskey scent
Well he ran right up and got a little shot
And back to his hole he went
Right back to his whole he went
Right back to his whole he went
Well he ran right up and got a little shot
And back to his hole he went
Then the rate come out of his hole once more
Sidled up to the gin on the floor
He was a little bit shy
But he winked one eye
And he got him a little bit more
And he didn’t go back to his hole this time
But stayed by the puddle of gin
And he said «Doggone my pop-eyed soul
I’m gonna get drunk again!»
And he washed his face with his front feet
And on his hind legs he sat
With a twisted smile and a half-closed eye
Says,"Where's that doggone cat?"
And he didn’t go back to his hole
He said, «Doggone my soul, I’m only a rat
But a doggone cat can’t run me back to my hole.»
His little old eyes begin to shine
And he capped up more and more
And it made me glad that I had stumbled
And spilled it on the floor
But soon the puddle of rum was gone
And I didn’t have any more gin
And the little old rat was having a time
And the old tom cat come in
Well the cat made a pass
And the rat made a dash
And his boldness faded then
The cat jumped over
And the rat got sober
And ran back to his hole again
Ran back to his hole again
Well, that cat jumped over
And the rat got sober
And ran back to his hole again
Ran back to his hole again