Lefty

Lefty’s in the minors, got his shoulder packed in ice
He’s trying to hang on there against all that good advice
Used to throw that sinker but that sinkerball went south
And then they started calling him for going to his mouth
Lefty holds the record for most strike-outs in a game
Once upon a time he really threw a ball of flame
Some wish he’d gone gracefully when his time finally came
They put Lefty on waivers but nobody laid a claim
It’s a Godalmighty shame — he got too old to play the game
Where he made himself a name — and they call him Lefty
Lefty wore the pinstripes for a good number of years
The bleacher bums all loved him — they were tanked up with their beer
He used to throw that heater, but the radar does not lie
And now when Lefty lays one up there you can kiss that thing goodbye
It’s a Godalmighty shame — he got too old to play the game
Where he made himself a name — and they call him Lefty
Now they’re calling him from Cooperstown — out on the bullpen phone
Some little field in Bumfolk where the grass is overgrown
It’s the bottom of the 7th and a runner just got on
And they’re calling for a lefty… but Lefty’s not the one
There’s a capital «L» in Lefty, so say it with respect
He’s Senor Lefty down in Mexico & he’s Lefty in Quebec
He could smoke you, he could fool you, throw a curve around your neck
He could paint one on the corners, he could fill the upper deck
It’s a Godalmighty shame — he got too old to play the game
Where he made himself a name — and they call him Lefty