
This morning everything was going great Woke up on top of it all Honestly, I didn’t see that I would fall Flash-forward and I really cannot overstate How totally my ship went down And now my son might run me out of town I’d love to change what I have done But I don’t have that kind of control Failed Father Island, here I come Where I’ll eat only sand and poop in a hole I thought I was a genius But it turns out I just a dumb dad A prrrt on a scale of one to ten Why didn’t I foresee this? I ruined this day and now I’m sad Please, can we do today again? Hello, today is going great Knock wood, I’m on top of it all Honestly, I never expected this windfall At home, my heart began to palpitate Wasn’t sure how this would go down I fully thought my ship would run aground My daughter’s a bad-ass chess-machine And I’ve never been more proud I’m as giddy as a mom could be But now I’m not afraid to say aloud I guess I’m a genius A mom who puts other moms to shame A hell yeah on a scale of one to ten Bow down before my queen-ness I will check every mate in every game Please, can we do today again? I wanna unsay (the winner is here) So much of today (for mom of the year) I wanna have a chance to replay (I'll take my crown) I wanna do over (and rose bouquet) Don’t make much ado over (this feels pretty great) Don’t wanna stew over (so why not just celebrate the) Surprise that was today So call me a genius A mom (a dad) On top of the game A woo on a scale of one to ten I want to decree this A day to put in the hall of fame (shame) Please, can we do today again?
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