Papyrus Containing the Spell to Protect Its Possessor Against Attacks from He Who Is in the Bong Water

Sativa master, Mighty lord of weed
(Mighty lord of weed)
Please grant your knowledge unto me
The foul bringer of bud shall be reborn in the smoke
(Reborn in the smoke)
Invoke holy spirit of the one most dank
Long have we
Traveled seeking
Weed most devine
We must get high
You stand upon necks of authority
At each side the bongs of chaos
Thousands of dead shall lay before me
Roasting the bones of our enemy
The enemy
Read from Papyrus
Containing the Spell to Protect
Its Possessor Against Attacks
From He Who Is in the Bong Water
Protection from the loathsome non smokers we seek
Oh great one of exalted herb please bestow us with your dank gifts
Bowls that burn the souls of the slain
Praise to the altars of glass
Bless us with your exhalation
Open your holy lungs
Savage and unmerciful
Laying waste to everything
Primordial anger
Now unleashed!
You stand upon necks of authority
At each side the bongs of chaos
Thousands of dead shall lay before me
Roasting the bones of our enemy
The enemy
Read from Papyrus
Containing the Spell to Protect
Its Possessor Against Attacks
From He Who Is in the Bong Water