Toddler With a Slingshot (Hell Yep)

You pay me to exaggerate, I think I’ve done enough
Of turning bummers into heartaches and crushes into love
Sometimes our lives are mild, our stories: just okay
I’ll set your expectations in the middle when I say: «Hell yep»
A hell yep
And knock me down a peg
When I wanna be a big shot
I’m just a toddler
With a slingshot
For example:
I got cornered by a salesman at a farmers market booth
Selling cheap ceramic bowls mant for dogs to eat their food
I haggle lik a master, I showed them how I do
I didn’t want one, but I got a deal for two
Hell yep
I don’t have a regret
Or a dog
Knock me down a peg
When I wanna be a big shot
I’m just a toddler with a slingshot
Don’t have the strength
Don’t have the aim
I’m building up my motor skills and everything’s a game
You say I’m harmless (you're probably right)
But nothing is more trouble than a toddler going quiet
Keep an eye on me, keep your eye, keep your eye on me
… and knock me down a peg when I wanna be a big shot
I’m just a toddler with a slingshot
I asked for half your candy bar
You raised it in the air
And split it down the middle
Made a perfect little pair
You smiled like a sweetheart
My hand extended out
You winked at me and popped
Both of the pieces in your mouth
Hell nope
That one’s a hell nope… no mercy with a Hershey ‘fore she
Knocked me down a peg
When I wanna be a big shot
I’m just a toddler with a slingshot
Don’t have the strength
Don’t have the aim
I’m building my-my-motor skills
And everything’s a game
You say I’m harmless (so did Goliath)
But nothing is more trouble
Than a toddler going quiet
Keep an eye on me
Keep your eye, keep your eye
And watch me well
Or I’ll raise a little hell
… a hell yep
They asked me for a catch phrase
I didn’t miss a step
If their story’s kind of boring
You can tell 'em: «Hell Yep,» Hell Yep!
Knock me down a peg
When I wanna be a big shot
And I will kick it up the next notch
And if I work, put in the labor
Blood, sweat, call in every favor
Eat my veggies, say my prayers
Push myself to be a danger…
… I’ll be a preteen with a Taser