Walker, Texas Corpse

Your character’s supposed to be 40
But you have to be at least 80
The make-up department should win an Emmy
For making people think you’re alive
Chuck Norris—you're really fucking old
You’re the worst singer I have ever heard
You’re even worse than I am
You should be climbing out of a grave
While you sing the fucking theme song
You look like you just got embalmed
And were shopping for a coffin
Your partner looks fucking stupid
Being black and wearing a cowboy hat