Catharsis

Separate faces help him to walk and cross the tiles
As he justifies existence
With flinches and false smiles
And the hand that used to feed his hunger shrivelled from the cold
He’s borrowed more than he can pay
His debts are getting old
The cracks had always been on show
The spirit always broke
The bottle always emptied
Well before the candles smoked
Tabacco always there on queue
In someone else’s glass
Someone else’s secrets become someone else’s path
I know you well
I know you felt
Like it should’ve been someone else
Who fell
But I’ll never forget your face
You melt into my life…
I want the attention that shes getting
From your loving arms
You let me soak your face into my memory
Like you want me and you had me wanting more
As I don’t know you
I don’t own you
I just sew you
Into pieces of this fabric that I wear over my shoulder
Like a dream, you fill me up
And make me whole
Just like a soldier
Trains her mind to do the killing even though he isn’t willing
I have pain and I am cold
Without your heat to make me bold
Just forget that were not molded
Were just solitary soldiers
Given up in all this love stuff
Its made up and were just older
I give up on you
Were over
I want reciprocal lovers
I want trust and I want safety
I need space and I need chasing
I want to feel that I’m the only girl around you who can know you
But I want to see you luring other women who can’t own you
I want to see their faces
When you make them lose their graces
When you make them feel they’re placeless
Like a chain around an object that keeps moving
You’re a concept of a man
And of an object
You are everything I wanted
All I seem to crave
Like a hero needs to save
Except when I get up close
There is a maggot on the rose
Like a magpie stealing shiny things
There’s sometimes diamonds
Sometimes tin
You are my darkness and you understand
I don’t want anything but your hand
Just hold me steady
Hold the frame
And I’ll shoot again now!
I can’t stop thinking about you
And if you’re stripping me down to
My brittle bones and crumbled joints
These open wounds just need some salt
Oh, it would be better if you left
If I can’t see you I can’t step into the light
You’ve cast about you
I can’t have you but I want you
This obsession is not letting me slide
I feel I’m damaging myself to stay alive
I am destroying all I have
To let this burn easily
A little flame is not so dangerous on its own